Monday, October 30, 2006

Happy Halloween!


I made this! Yay! Although Ross helped.

This weekend I went to see The Film Where Everybody Dies (In A Violent And Bloody Way), had to wave bye bye to Ross, which sucks a lot, and went to The Munchkin's housewarming where I was great at Singstar and rubbish at Dance Mat (although Dance Mat was fun and lots of exercise, always a good thing!). Oooh and I got the top that flaunts what I've got...

And in plant news I have one measly cherry tomato on my humugous vines - that was all they made. The Christmas Cactus thinks it's allready Christmas (eeek!) and I suspect one of the hoyas that's not supposed to flower for years has a little flower bud on it. Yay! I bought another one, very naughty, but I think I've lost two cuttings anyway :(

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

In My Email Box Today...

I just had to share this one with you...

Hi,

I was wondering if anybody just happened to have a large capacity floor standing refrigerated centrifuge that they wanted to sell? Unfortunately my supervisor decided to set my previous one on fire.

This Week I Shall Mostly Be Dancing...

....because there's brownie just when I need it
....because I'm having my first singing lesson next week
....because Ross is coming to see me tonight
....because I can.

Friday, October 13, 2006

What happens if you fall asleep on the underground...


This guy had fallen asleep, so the people next to us decided to cover his hair with shaving foam. Two minutes after this photo was taken, he decided to wake up. Thankfully we (who had nothing to do with this, I hasten to add, we were just opposite him) were at Mile End, our change stop, so we could escape quickly...

Monday, October 09, 2006

A Metaphor


A bale of straw contains over a million straws.

What happens when there are no more straws?

Say it like Neo: "There is no bale"

Friday, October 06, 2006

In My Email Box this Morning (6th October)

"Get a PSP & top game from £169.99" offer is subject to availability and may be changed or withdrawn without notice by Amazon.co.uk at any time. Offer ends on September 30th, 2006 see website Terms and Conditions for further details.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Things that make me wonder...

What happens to odd socks that are lost? Do they live under the bed waiting for someone to find them?

Why is it that I've got the third cold in as many weeks?

Cholate is nothing at all to do with chocolate, sadly.


I forgot to tell the organic guy I don't like celery and now have a whole bunch of it. Eeeugh!

You know you've been out of it when you leave the oven gas on all night (not burning) and you come to your bycicle only to find it's been randomly locked up.

I want to spend the weekend not doing much and chilling out, but I also want to be sociable. Do I go to a cheese and wine night and risk drinking too much wine?

Why is it that loud noises and bad smells (especially celery!) affect me a lot at the moment?

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Millions of Peaches, Peaches for Me


Sorry, I can't but help fall into the Presidents Of The USA song whenever I think of peaches. The unknown fruit/nut tree that has been sat in my garden has in fact turned out to be a peach. I never thought that peach trees would bear fruit in this country but I was wrong. Maybe I should have been listening to James and the Giant Peach a bit harder. Never mind, I now have at least 10 peaches to eat before the slugs and other bugs get them.
mmmmm... millions of peaches, peaches for me, millions of peaches, peaches for free.....

Monday, September 25, 2006

The Willow Tree


This is my parent's willow tree. It broke, so they had to hack away at it until it stood almost naked. It's exposed now, bare until it can grow some new branches.
How the mighty can crumble... but it's all ready growing.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Observations of A Wednesday Morning

I hate spiders. I particularly hate it when I happily wander into a room and it's just there, on the floor. This makes me go highly girly and scream lots. Then I squash it, and then have to leave the hoover over it for at least five minutes to make sure it's been sucked up.

Why is it that even this picture gives me the willies?













I also wonder why I just spent £5 for the priviledge of being shown how to use 3 pieces of equipment that I probably could have figured out in five seconds. Be aware of a slightly uncoordinated (or should that be VERY uncoordinated) tall woman attempting to use the running machines. I tried it for a few moments today and it was allready comedy. On a related note I recently saw the bizarrest video involving a band doing a syncronised dance on treadmills.

This is OK Go. They are probably quite strange.

Monday, September 18, 2006

The Curious Incidents Of Hilary In The Daytime

First of all, here is my sunflower

Isn't it amazing that one small seed can produce something so heauge? It's pretty. And the only one on the street, ha ha.
















Note to self - don't go online when drunk!
Because this is what will happen... my obsession with hoyas reached a climax last week when I came home and decided to buy 6 hoyas after a few bevvies. I recieved the plants four days later and then was slightly concerned about how I was going to make them all grow. I decided, as it's a bit cold now, to get them a little propagator in the hope that will make them happy and root quickly.

On my way back from the nursery with the propagator somehow stuffed into my pannier, the most bizarre thing happened. I was cycling along relatively happily (I was tired and I wanted to get home) when suddenly a car goes past me, I hear a loud clap and my top leg is instantly in agony. Someone shot me with a paintball-style gun. Luckily it didn't break the skin (much) but it gave me quite a shock. The Munchkin told me today that this is something UWE students do to people, just shoot paintballs at them. Is this their idea of fun?

Although, this has to be the first bruise I didn't inflict upon myself...

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Onion and Mushroom Gravy

Tasty, tasty, very very tasty

Serves 3 hungry people

A knob butter
Two Onions, sliced
A box mushrooms, sliced
Good splash red wine
Teaspoon cornflour
Gravy browning
Vegetable stock cube
Hot water/water you've just boiled the potatoes/veg in

Melt butter in a pan or saucepan.
Add onions and fry on a medium heat until translucent, try not to burn
Add mushrooms and stir for a couple of minutes.
Add the wine and cook for a further five minutes.
Meanwhile, place the cornflour onto a saucer and mix into a splash of wine. Add a few drops (NO MORE!!!) of gravy browning until it goes brown.
Break stock cube over mushroom mixture and stir in. Mix in the cornflour mixture. Add a good splash of hot water and mix. Heat until the liquid thickens. Enjoy. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Good with bangers and mash.

Monday, September 11, 2006

9/11: I Was There

Ok folks, this is a personal entry about a distressing event. Please don't get upset with me when it gets distressing. I am only recounting the truth as I remember it.

September 9th, 2001. I was staying at my sister's husband's apartment in New York, in Greenwich Village, sleeping on the futon in the main room. I was at the end of my two month trip around the world and was just "passing through" on my way home. I was due to leave on the 10th and that day was going to go to the Stock Exchange.
Just after 9 we get a phone call. It's Richard, my sister's husband, telling us someone's just flown into the World Trade Centre. Immediately we put the news on, and the first reports were coming in. Someone filmed the second one coming in, and they put that on the news. As soon as I saw it I knew it was no accident.

The rest of the day and the next few days are a bit of a blur. I remember us all sat around the room in shock watching the news for hours on end. One of the guys who came to sit with us, a friend of Theresa or Richards, I can't remember, had seen people jumping out of the windows to save themselves. The towers came down in fairly quick succession to each other and I remember thinking that when the second one came down, it was a replay of the first one until I looked out the toilet window and saw it go down. I went out later in the day to see people sat in parks watching the smoke and listening to their radios. None of the phones were working but for some reason the internet was so we managed to get emails out to our family that we were OK. I remember sending one to Tony, who then kindly sent it on to all the people I'd been emailing about my trip round the world, who then sent me emails back saying they were glad I was OK.

We'd spent lunch not two days before in the World Trade Centre cafe, I remember lifts that made your stomach jump, and afterwards we wondered what had happened to those people there. My flight, of course, did not leave the next day, so I had a couple of extra days in New York. I couldn't go visit the Empire State Building and taxis could only take you so far downtown. I particularly remember going to an Indian a couple of days later downtown and making some crass remark about the mango ice cream being an insult against humanity.

The real thing I remember about my trip is the flight home. I'd spent days trying to find out from BA when I could get a flight. In the end they started flying back on the Friday. So, on Friday, I made my way to JFK International airport. My sister had told me to come back if they weren't flying out but I knew I probably wouldn't be coming back. JFK was complete chaos, nobody knew what flight they were going to take if any, and you just checked your baggage in and hoped. I had a moment trying to explain what a digeridoo was (I had just been to Australia) and had to put it in the hold as it was a dangerous instrument... I then just sat for what was probably hours waiting to see if I'd get a flight out. In the departure lounge, if you could call it that, there were no shops, nothing. I was starving and hoping that I would get through and get something to eat. I'd promised myself cesar salad if I did. Sometime a bit later the lady who had served me at checkouts came round saying "Are you Roberts?" I answered yes, that I was. She'd got me a ticket to London, and somehow remembered me, it was the most bizarre thing ever. so I finally got through the passport control and to a restaurant, where, believe it or not, they were serving cesar salad. I was squashed in economy and on a night flight, but I didn't give a shit, I was going home. None of the payphones were working but I managed to get to the information desk and ask one of the ladies there if I could borrow her mobile to call my sister. I was lucky once more as there was such a queue for the phone that soon after I got through the lady wasn't letting anyone call on her phone any more.
One thing I remember about the flight home is that I was really scared to change my watch back to English time until I knew I was back in London. You have no idea how overjoyed I was when we flew over London and I saw the Millenium Wheel. Then I knew I was home.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Gone In 60 Seconds

If I could steal cars, these would be the ones I'd try and get away with:

Kit
Well, if you're going to steal a car, why not a fictional one?

A Delorean
As above. Preferably one that could fly. That would be cool. Not so bothered about the time travel bit...

Pontiac Firebird Trans-Am 1979
Well, if you were going on a stealing spree, you might just pick one up for the boyfriend. Cos you love him.

Ferrari Enzo
Well, you'd have to steal a Ferrari. And this is the one everyone talks about.

An Old MG
My car knowledge doesn't go very far but I'd like one of those cute MGs I see sometimes rusting in corners.

Austin DB9
So I could pretend to be Bond, although knowing me I'd be a complete pansy in it. If only you could get one with rocket launchers so you can remove the traffic in front of you. Oooh, and a passenger ejector seat in case you don't like the person sat next to you.... he he

And, of course, the Batmobile.

Saionara.

Monday, September 04, 2006

This Week, I Shall Be Mostly Dancing...

The "I get free plants" dance

Yay! As most of you know, I'm completely obsessed with plants, especially Hoyas. I recently bought a hoya off a Swedish trade site (try doing this and not knowing any Swedish...) and then realised that in order to send the seller money, I would have to pay £20 for the privilege (meep) of transferring £10 to a Swedish bank account. But, instead, if I have plants she doesn't have, all I have to do is pay for the postage of sending her plants in return for new plants coming through the post to me...

*dancing*

Thursday, August 31, 2006

"She's All That" Causes Confusion

Ah. Film Four. The now-free film channel brings us quality films every day.
Really?
Well, maybe if you're a girl and/or like trashy films you may have enjoyed the offering of "She's All That". I was slightly bemused, but it was very watchable, as I am a trashy film-o-holic...

The premise of the film was high-school jock is dumped by largest bitch (i.e. the most popular girl in school) six weeks before the prom. He is bet by not-so-good-buddy to take the dorkiest girl in school and make her prom queen. Yes, it really is that trashy. But there are some good twists in the tale.

But I was confused. I was confused because the dork kept wearing a felafel on her head, the jock made up some random stage show about hakeysacks (sp?), the dork made her art-class rival look like a clown, the jock didn't kiss the girl half-way through the film for some unknown reason, Sarah Michelle-Gellar sits in the canteen and has a non-speaking cameo, and they just start dancing in sync during the prom scene..... and the dork was called Laney Boggs...

And I am confused...

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Blame It On The Boogie... Or The Tall People (Part One)

Ah... August weekend. What to do - spend a weekend chilling out at home being fed by my mother and being the general dogsbody, going out with friends to camp in Croyde, getting rained on, or do something completely different with tall people?

Well, it had to be the tall people. The weekend started with the trip to Nottingham. The train station always seems to be three minutes ahead of me so maybe stopping to get cash when I only had three minutes to go was probably a stupid idea. Never mind, after much swearing I was on the next train a little poorer. The weekend may have started on a bad footing but was made much better by being able to find Ross and Rob (Tweedledum and Tweedledee with legs) in the pub next to the train station as soon as I did turn up in Nottingham. The hall we were staying in was a 20-minute trip from Nottingham in the very pleasant town of Eastwood. It was lovely, although a little bit claustrophobic - the corridors were a tad narrow for my liking!
We were supposed to have a barbeque for Friday night, but it rained. So they gave us food inside, which we were particularly grateful of after not eating since a pasty at lunch. The Directors dressed up as members of the Robin Hood tale (including one particularly fetching bloke, Stuart, in a Maid Marian outfit. Nice.) . Then there was big snakes and ladders, twister and kareoke. I lost the snakes and ladders, there was only half a twister (?) and went for singing Dream A Little Dream, again.
Saturday was "cultural day". We went to Nottingham Town centre to view the Robin Hood statue. I think most Nottingham residents get annoyed with the fact that that's all people associate Nottingham with. Well at least they don't always think of the fact that Nottingham has the one of the highest violent crime rates in the country! We spent some time in the caves looking at where they had bomb shelters (and then wondered if sandstone would actually protect from a bomb when it can be rubbed away with bare hands) and went on to the "Castle". Of course, Nottingham castle is actually a manor house and not a castle, but we weren't bothered. Especially when the group was approached by the local news and Ross got filmed for half a second...
Ah! And who was right beside him... Yes, little old me! Standing between Ross and Karsten (that's the other tall bloke, possibly just a wee bit taller than Ross at 7'4), which happened a lot to me, actually made me feel quite small!
After our starring role we got to have lunch and spend a little bit of time going round the castle before being picked up in our as-spacious-as-they-come- but-still-too-small-for-Ross coach. Our tour guide spent the trip to Sherwood forest telling us about Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men. The whole way, which was an hour and 40 minutes, or so I was told. I was told this, as despite the fact that our tour guide had a very loud voice and there was a speaker right above my head, I managed to sleep through a large percentage of the tale....

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Today I Shall Be Mostly Dancing....

The "I can make Ross' DVD Dance"

Ok, this may need some explanation. We have made up many phrases of the week but recently we have decided we needed a dance too. This is mainly because when I was bored one day, I just started to dance while Ellie and Pippa were setting a gel. This was rapidly christened "The Gel Setting Dance", which morphed into "The Gel Running Dance" which one day even included jazz hands (see, before this, all the dances were roughly the same dance, just for different purposes!). The dance is usually bad, and involves some kind of arm movement, not much leg movement. Last time Ross saw me do it he asked me if I was having a fit or something, rude boy. My favourite dance is the "Dried Mango" dance as we were in Asda the other day and found dried mango, which brought about dancing. We like dried mango. But we're not allowed to dance in front of it any more because apparently it's inefficient (or Tone just wants his dinner!)....

And, for your viewing enjoyment, here is the cover of Ross's new DVD project... since I'm definitely not taking a photo of me dancing badly (sorry!)

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Don't Tell Me Not To Fly, I've Simply Got To


I'm sorry, but Morris Dancing has to be one of the most eccentrically English (or is it British, I don't know) things there is. Grown men waving hankerchiefs with hats decorated with flowers. All with bells tied round their legs. Bizarre. Although I'd never seen a beast before. I just looked that one up. Apparently Morris dancing is thought of mostly as a English tradition, and is traditionally male. Although there are some groups who have women dancers too (well I was just wondering!).
This display was all part of the Bristol Flower Show, where, shockingly enough, I didn't buy any plants. Before you all gasp in wonder, I did buy some cider. Local scrumpy in a milk-style bottle. Nice. As well as some andouiette-style pork with stuffing bun (for those of you who aren't Jocelyn, andouiettes are rather disgusting local sausages we mistakenly purchased at a festival in Paris. Blargh.). I watched some fire cadets do five things with a ladder. I was a bit disappointed because I was hoping that firemen might be big and sexy and do some fire demonstration but apparently today it was just a few spotty teenagers with a ladder and a tarpaulin. But they did tie someone up which I guess was kind of exciting...
The final show was a magician. This bloke was actually quite a good entertainer as well and spent most of the time talking and not really doing any tricks, and seeing as he didn't know many this was a good thing. I was really entertained actually, especially with the Three Chairs And A Table Top trick which involved a lot of precarious balancing... oh, and three juggling balls, of course


Meep. And yes, he did get on that big unicycle in the front, and proceeded to circle round the entire crowd at much pace!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

I Had A Tractor, But It Didn't Work

I had a tractor, but it didn't work
I had a tractor, but it didn't work
I had a tractor, the wheels fell off
I had a tractor, the wheels fell off



I'm sorry, I just needed that.